* this post was actually supposed to be posted back in early February...
so yesterday I had a pretty chill day, and after class I went to costco with my mom and dad. it was really nice to just hang out with the two of them. my dad bought me a new tv which i love :D i haven't had a tv in my room for about 2 years now, since mine broke i got lazy and never bothered to purchase one. well besides the shopping it was just refreshing to hang out with my parents one on one. it felt nice to be the "only" child again.
it's crazy how things have changed, i am now 23 years old and as i look at my parents a part of me is saddened because i know they too are getting old... i just have this need and want to take care of them and make sure they are happy because that's all they've ever done for me and have never asked for anything in return. it's crazy how when we are young we are so close and cling onto our parents, but through the years i've grown apart from them... like many of my peers that enter adolescence and young adulthood. now a days i spend 75% of my time at the boyfriend's house instead of home, i miss home but there are many moments where little things just create a big argument and clash between my mother and myself, funny thing is even in childhood i was not so close to my mother; in fact i was closer to my father and admittedly will always be a daddy's girl.
looking at our relationship now, my mother and i have grown closer. she snickers sometimes about my behavior and being over at the bf's house too often, but really i've come to the conclusion its her way of saying she misses me. my mother was always affectionate with me as a child, but as i grew up it dwindled and eventually it was on rare occasions we would hug and such, but when we do it really is something special.
i know it may sound sad to some of you readers, but this is my reality and it's okay, my only wish is to continue to improve on the relationship i have with my mother as we both grow older.
anyways i guess i just wanted to point out the importance of taking time to slow down and just spend time with one's parents. sometimes i feel such regret for not spending more time with them, but in this i realize i still have time and need to utilize it to the best of my ability.
I totally get you. Throughout my teen years, i grew apart from my parents and thought they were too strict and didn't want me to have fun... of course as i grew older, i realized that that totally wasn't their purpose and that in everything they did, it was out of love. As i get older, i do get sad as well... seeing my parents getting older and all i want is to be able to take care of them, provide for them, and give them the things they've always wanted but couldn't have because they put me and my brother first!
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to reading more from your blog :)
Hi love, thank you always for your kind words/comments.
ReplyDeleteThe older I get, the more I realize that I've taken my family for granted and the more I want to be a better daughter for them. It's hard watching my parents get older because in some ways, I think they'll always be here. It's hard to imagine life without them. This year has been tragic, two of my close friends' dads passed away. It's a reality that's hard to grasp. So do what you can and show them that you love them, whether it's a hug or trying to be extra patient with them. I try to take time out of my busy schedule to go to lunch/dinner with them. Remember to take family photos so that you all have something to look back at. And pray that they'll see and feel how much you treasure their love.